I'm
sharing the following with you, because I know I am not the only person
who has ever experienced what I'm about to share with you. It's a
topic which I doubt has really ever been discussed in detail in any
public venue.
Several
years ago I saw an elderly couple walking in a parking lot of a mall in
my home town. The couple looked very familiar to me, yet I was having a
difficult time placing them. As I got closer I realized who they were.
. . I said, "hi mom, hi dad". They looked at me, said hello and then
wished me a good day as they went on with their day. These were two
people who I spent the first eighteen years of my life with. Though
they are biologically my parents, they are virtually strangers to me.
Today
is my father's 78th birthday. It's such an odd thing to say that I
haven't known my father since he was 47. He's been out of my life for
over 30 years.
I know that I am not the only adult
survivors of child abuse (emotional, physical and sexual abuse) that is
confronted with not knowing what to do, nor how to feel when birthdays,
mother's day, father's day and or other holidays or anniversaries come
around. For me, these types of days often leaves a void of emotions and feelings.
I
know that several other adult survivors of child abuse may also need to
separate from their families to heal, yet often keep it a secret for
fear of being shamed or looked at as being different. I felt that
it was important to share my experience in hopes of helping others
realize that they are not alone, and to know that they do not need to
keep their silence any longer.
I
also felt the need to acknowledge my father's special day some how. I
guess this note is my way of saying "Happy Birthday Dad".
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