By Rabbi Robert Sax
Mahzor Lev Shalem - For Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur
Published by The Rabbinical Assembly
Dear God,
You know my heart.
Indeed, You know me better than I know myself,
so I turn to You before I
rise for Kaddish.
My emotions swirl as I say this prayer. The
parent I remember was
not kind to me. His/her
death left me with a legacy of unhealed wounds,
of anger and of dismay
that a parent could hurt a
child as I was hurt.
I do not want to pretend to love, or to grief
that I do not feel, but I do
want to do what is right
as a Jew and as a child.
Help me, O God, to subdue my bitter
emotions that do me no
good, and to find that
place in myself where
happier memories may
lie hidden, and where
grief for all that could
have been, all that should
have been, may be
calmed by forgiveness,
or at least soothed by the
passage of time.
I pray that You, who raise up slaves to
freedom, will liberate me
from the oppression of
my hurt and anger, and
that You will lead me
from this desert to Your
holy place. —robert Saks
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